Episode #26, Part 2: Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) & Understanding How to Build Trust and Strengthen Connections - Patricia Young

TITLE

Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) & Understanding How to Build Trust and Strengthen Connections

GUEST

Anya Surnitsky, LCSW

EPISODE OVERVIEW

We use Brene Brown’s work on attachment to continue our discussion about security, safety, and steps to building strong relationships. We talk about the marble jar and how trust can be established. We discuss vulnerability and how our needs can be met through connection and intimacy, as well as how to set boundaries to create safety. We include the traits of being a Highly Sensitive Person, and looking through the lens of Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN).

HIGHLIGHTS

Braving–the 7 components of trust from Brene Brown’s work
Giving ourselves permission to try and understand, that even though we experienced wounding before, that the new people in our lives won’t necessarily be like the old people in our lives
The Marble Jar method and, how it works in relationship building We discuss the importance of being shown by someone that you matter to them
We talk about the importance of vulnerability
HSPs often need to have time for transition before and after (work,
getting up, arriving home, etc.)
The importance for HSPs to be fully rested before having difficult
conversations, so we are resilient and can be fully present
We discuss how to check in with yourself; understanding where in your
body, you are having reactions, and slowing down before you respond
We talk about the relationship between Childhood Emotional Neglect
(CEN), wounding, neglect, shame triggers and how to work through
these things
BREATHING –the 7 components of trust as outlined by Brene Brown is explained: Boundaries, Reliability, Accountability, Fault, Integrity, Non-judgement, and Generosity

Resources

Brene Brown Super Soul Sunday on trust:
http://www.oprah.com/own-supersoulsessions/brene-brown-what-to-do-when-you-struggle-with-trust

CES Therapy
http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/cranial-electrotherapy-stimulation
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/integrative-mental-health-care/201809/cranial-electrotherapy-stimulation-ces-anxiety

BIO

Anya Surnitsky is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in private practice outside
Philadelphia, PA. She helps anxious high achievers and overgivers with big
wounded hearts to transform their pain into power and avoidance into action.

Anya uses her training in EMDR, Ego State Therapy, and Childhood Emotional Neglect, as well as her certification in The Daring WayTM to aid clients in making peace with the past, embrace the present, and develop confidence for the future. Anya is passionate about educating clients on how trauma and/or neglect affects the developing brain to understand how unhealed wounds from the past show up in the present and can have a negative impact on their future. With these various approaches, Anya shows clients how to heal from both a top-down and a bottom-up approach; we can heal the brain so it can learn to help itself, and we can also learn skills to help ourselves on a conscious level.

Throughout her personal and professional journey, Anya has learned that what people want more than anything is to be seen and heard for who they are at their core. For Unapologetically Sensitive listeners, Anya has put together some scripts for hard conversations to help HSP’s ask to be heard and dare to be seen in their relationships. Go to www.couragecompasstherapy.com/hsp

PODCAST HOST

Patricia Young, LCSW is a coach & therapist in California. Patricia works with Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) helping them understand their HSPness, and to turn their perceived shortcomings into superpowers. Patricia is passionate about providing education to help HSPs and non-HSPs understand and truly appreciate all the gifts we have to offer. Patricia provides online (telehealth) therapy to people who live in California, and she provides coaching to people all over the world. We meet over a private platform (similar to Skype), and you can have therapy or coaching from the privacy of your own home—when the kids are at school or are napping; from work; in your pajamas, or when you just can’t face sitting in traffic or going out.