Attachment: Self-Compassion, Recognizing & Healing Unblended Parts
Patricia and Jen discuss their personal experiences with attachment injuries and how it affects their relationship. They explore the challenges of communication and the impact of past traumas. Patricia shares insights from her recovery journey, drawing parallels between her eating disorder and her attachment struggles. They emphasize the importance of self-compassion and understanding in navigating these complex dynamics. The conversation concludes with a discussion on the value of conflict and the importance of welcoming all parts of ourselves.
CO-HOST
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC
HIGHLIGHTS
Summary
Patricia and Jen discuss the experience of being preoccupied with attachment injuries and how it affects their thoughts and behaviors. They explore the concept of being blended with certain parts and the importance of unblending to gain perspective. They also touch on the role of a catalyst in triggering attachment wounds and the process of healing and unblending. They emphasize the need for self-compassion and understanding when going through intense emotions and trauma work
Takeaways
- Attachment injuries can impact relationships and trigger past traumas.
- Communication can be challenging when attachment wounds are activated.
- Self-compassion and understanding are crucial in navigating attachment struggles.
- Recovery from past traumas requires self-reflection and self-awareness. Attachment injuries can lead to preoccupation with thoughts and behaviors related to the relationship.
- Being blended with certain parts can make it difficult to gain perspective and let go of preoccupations.
- The presence of a catalyst in triggering attachment wounds can provide an opportunity for healing and growth.
- Self-compassion and understanding are crucial when going through intense emotions and trauma work.
- Conflict can be seen as an opportunity for growth and understanding, rather than something negative or bad.
Sound Bites
“I’m actually doing really well. This is day four of feeling like I’m back to my grounded self.”
“In the absence of having information and without a secure attachment, I made up a story in my head of like, you didn’t even respond to this.”
“Confidence is such a beautiful attribute sometimes, right? That I have the confidence that you have this.”
“When I’m in a place where I’m struggling with my attachment injuries, I’m preoccupied about the thoughts that I have about you, where you are, where I am in the relationship.”
“In IFS terms, we would say blended, right? When you’re so completely blended, there’s no other perspective.”
“This preoccupied stuff is, oof, I mean, it can get so intense.”
Chapters (please adjust for the addition of the introduction)
00:00 Introduction and Personal Updates
03:27 Parenting Challenges and Appreciation
05:10 Navigating Attachment Injuries and Communication Challenges
08:06 The Impact of Past Traumas on Relationships
11:25 Understanding the Complex Dynamics of Attachment
16:14 Articulating Experiences and Symbolic Communication
21:36 Blended Parts and Unblending
25:20 The Role of a Catalyst
29:59 Healing and Unblending
37:47 Conflict as an Opportunity
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you
CO-HOST BIO
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive People thrive in love, work, and parenting Highly Sensitive Children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering.
LINKS
Jen’s Links
Email: Jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com
Jen’s website: https://heartfulnessconsulting.com/
Patricia’s Links
Neurodivergent Online Course– https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/neurodivergent-online-courses/
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Music– Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com